Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Feeling "Screwed"


 Oh the joy of being a Houstonian ----

 I recently moved to Kemah and now have a commute to the JFK area near the airport and I love my job, but at the end of the day…is it just me that even though you know that awaiting at home you have either a frozen meal, a home cooked meal or for the health nuts an energized shake full of “stuff” (ingredients I cannot even pronounce) that Jack-N-Box sign like in the alien movies drags you towards the drive through…and next you  know you are purchasing 2 tacos for 99 cents!

 Well dang me for wanting to eat on the go…safer than texting, I am eating on the drive, sloppily letting the taco sauce drip as I maneuver through the traffic and all of a sudden you are cut off by a driver having no intention of respecting your beloved taco devour and now all over your dress…not even a wave to say “Thanks for letting me be an A-Hole and possibly take your life and the loss of your beloved 99 cent taco!”

Driving to work this morning, allowing everyone to pass me as I was going over the speed limit jamming to Foo Fighters I pulled up behind this truck – THE BIGGEST SCREWS I HAVE EVER SEEN…I pulled around it (of course taking a picture before I did --- ***NOTE I DO NOT PROMOTE TAKING PICTURES WHILE DRIVING…BUT COULD NOT RESIST) I moved over to the alternate lane and ALL that were behind me attempting to pass got behind this truck and remained behind him until the beltway unable to pass…I chuckled.

We all seem in life we are screwed in some form…work, relationships, etc…well you are NEVER really screwed until stuck at 40 miles in a 65 mph lane behind this guy…Make it a happy day Ya’ll!!


Tuesday, July 21, 2015

365 Day Challenge...


It has been way too long…my passion is to write and thankful for a lazy Sunday watching ‘Jules and Julia’ it inspired me to get back into writing.  I started a blog a long while back…kept up with it as Mike was on his journey and even after and slightly drifted off…well I am back…I have too much to say, feel so much and am challenging myself to write daily…no matter the issue…it will continue to be my therapy…
Stay tuned and thank you ALL for support through the years…YOU ALL inspire me! XOXOXOXO



Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Lost Hope…A COMPLETE Myth

Do you ever ponder on the things that we focus on…the UN-important things…The Starbucks that got your coffee wrong (YES even though it is a Hundred dollars a cup)…the irate driver cutting you off (yet they may be rushing to a family member in need or meeting a deadline to impress the boss)…these small things at times give us the feeling that it is the end of the world…we lose hope in humanity, ourselves and all around us at times.
I lost my husband to cancer at the age of 33…I NEVER lost HOPE.  I continue to know that I have a purpose as did he while here…we ALL do.  Absorb it all…take chances on someone you never thought you would.  Have NO regrets.  Love your family NO matter how F***ed at times they seem or even you to them.  Know that NO matter the trenches you have crawled, the bridges you have burned, the people you have had to let go in your life to grow…YOU will ALWAYS be you ---- YOU must NEVER lose HOPE in your daily journey ----- OXOXOXOOXOXO

Friday, July 25, 2014

HUMILITY - Blessing in Disguise

“Humility = humbleness”

WOW!  What a fucking month!! 
I have always been humble…showed gratitude to all who partook in my life…before Mike, During Mike and After…at the ripe ole’ age of 35 had I never expected my adolescent stupid mistakes carry on into my now…welcome to Humility 101.

Ya’ll all know me…whether I see you in person often, text every hour, or via-Facebook (for this is the new norm – and I do not mind…we are all busy) and to allow minutes, hours out of our day to connect vi-internet to see children grow, families develop, and all other intimate details we share…here is mine.

I strive to be SOOOOO positive at all times, for I do not feel like it is your duty to take on any negative in my life – I like to use FB for Happiness, Kartwheels and rainbows ;) but in reality…I have daily struggles.  Had a great upbringing, took some uncharted paths and ultimately ended up marrying the love of my life…he was my true wave on wave.  During this Euphoria,  I ignored and blocked out all the mishaps of my early 20’s…DWI, minor traffic violations that I most likely got the notice and discredited and tossed into the “bill” pile and never looked back…oh my 20’s ---- they seemed so simple and something to never look back at…

As Ya’ll know – I have dreamed of  a JEEP since I was in high school…being raised on dirt roads during my Summers and knowing this vehicle line flowed through my blood…the chance recently came about to have my very own…little did I know 2001-2007 would hop my happiness train and welcome themselves aboard and remind me of what I never took care of and faced.   It has been heck ya’ll…applying for a simple loan to only realize you have NO credit then on top to realize your past quickly catches up with you in a heartbeat and 3K later…you are back to “normal”…(whatever that is)

I suppose my entry is to remind us all…we can run from our past…we can duck and hide and actually walk for a while…but it will catch up.

In closing…Be honest with your surroundings, be honest with your loved ones and FOREMOST, be honest with yourself ---- so worth it in the end.

As of today…I am a proud Owner of a JEEP ---- Ironically my payments start 10/11/14 --- Mike’s Birthday…Still think he remains to poke himself in my life --- I always welcome…


Thursday, July 3, 2014

THE 7 (scratch that)...6 YEAR ITCH


My math is SO bad…it would have been 6 years…not 7.  I will never forget the day he called me and asked me to meet him on the Court House steps and make it official --- July 3rd

I want to continue to thank ALL that have been a part of my life past, present and all that will be a part of my future.  I am a blessed to have been loved by such an amazing man! 
As I write this, I am so thank(FULL) for all the support and love from Ya’ll for acceptance and happiness for my NEW journey with “The Mister” ---  It is God’s will for the doors he closes in our lives he TRULY does open up a window and I have been granted a WIDE open window, an opportunity to love again and be loved – I deserve it…we ALL deserve it. 
Today I honor the vows I took with Mike…truly lived till death did us part, and today I continue to truck on and celebrate all the newness that comes my way and all the new memories I continue to make…memories that leave me with a smile at the end of the day…

Friday, April 11, 2014

Not Just ANY Sandwich...


There are songs that jog your memory, there are pictures that send memories rushing in - then there is food…

I am so simple when it comes to food…I am a fan of burnt hot dogs, mac-n-cheese and if in a rare mood I am not opposed to busting out the Raman Noodles!  I am not much on chain restaurants --- I will take a local family owned-Taqueria over it all.   Mike was the same way and being on the road all day he was no stranger to the taco trucks, fast food and the coinsurer of great dives!  Running errands at lunch today on a side of town I had not been in a little while, going down Alabama, I happen to glance up and notice Joe’s Deli…a hole in the wall tucked in between a Washateria and a Domino’s pizza…they have the ultimate TUNA sandwiches and best Egg Salad Sandwiches, which all combos…sandwich, chips and soda you can grab on any day for less than 4 dollars!!!!

Anyhow, memories came rushing back, for when on days when Mike was working near my building, he would scoop me up and we would park our fannies on the little stools looking out the window and just non-stop chatter about our day and days to come.  I have not been back there since Mike passed and walking in there today, a rush came flowing over me…a hello and smile from the owner asking how Mike and I were…he had not seen us in a great while…It took me off guard, it has been two years and did not realize the time passed since I had been there, Mike too…I smiled and at a moment that would usually turn me into a complete Alice Cooper picture, I hated to share the news of Mike, but thanked him for remembering his customers and their faces --- He sighed and hated to hear the news, gave me hug and said Mike was someone that completely touched his life.  He would come in between jobs and never just ordered and ran…he asked about family, personal happenings when they were mentioned and always followed up.  He said Mike was always smiling, never a frown and because of the smallness of the shop, he would sometimes hear our conversations as Mike would call me while at lunch --- always laughing and he remembers fondly us always talking fishing and our dogs. 

I admit, I had to hold back tears – I had to hold back completely breaking down as he placed my sandwich, soda and chips in a little plastic wrap bag.  I walked out, pulled on to Alabama and just smiled.  I thought I would cry, I thought I would break down…instead I thanked the good Man Above for this moment.  For the time I got to have lunch and talk about nothing in particular with Mike.  I smiled that even though he is no longer here physically, he in deed touched so many lives and obviously has left a mark on people that only had him as a customer in their deli on an every other week basis…yet he is remembered even after 2 years of not visiting.

On this note I want to thank Mike, my Hott Pockett for being him and nothing else for anyone.  Loving life to the fullest and never missing a chance to get to know someone when time was allowed.  Loving me so hard and providing me with a fantastic friendship, union ship and while here just being the sunshine on my face when I woke up (even on a cloudy day) and being the moonlight and stars in my eyes (even when the city lights masked the starlight)…

I hope from this we can all know that even when we do not realize our actions can speak volumes…be kind…smile as much as you can…talk with your eyes, it truly does translate your soul…and make time for the small things, for those to others are THE BIG THINGS --- XOXOXOX


Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Passing GO and Collecting a NEW Life...


Wow!  Hello Ya’ll – I have become a little sporadic in my blogging…something I clinged to during Mike and I’s journey…not only to keep you all in the loop the easiest way I knew, but for my own sanity as well – I could wrap myself up in words and turn a simple day of anything into providing every detail to ensure you all knew our every step and felt as if you were there…during the journey and even as “our” journey ended and “my” journey started as…Lyndie…not JUST a widow.

2014  has already proved to be an inspiring and happy year -- Work remains amazing, family and friends continue to just prove themselves and remind me how blessed  I am to have each and every one in my life…whether I see and talk daily, weekly, monthly or the occasional (Thumbs Up ;) on Facebook – haha! and I have been blessed with another chance of happiness. 
After Mike’s passing, so many different emotions of how I was supposed to grieve, how long, “to date or not to date?” ---- as I have stated before, after losing Mike, I surely did not receive a handbook on wrongs or rights in this new norm.  I did not have direction from anyone that was walking in my shoes with advice as to the “protocol” of what my next move was to be --- was I to pass GO and collect a new life?  Mike was loved by so many – we both were loved by many – I continue to be loved by many and his memory lives on and cherished by the same many…

I took a chance on dating, floundering like a fish out of water for the past year and half, knowing that it was no longer “Mike and Lyndie”, yet I was out on my own – I could choose to LIVE or Die --- after losing him, for one hour I debated not wanting to be here without him…how could I go on?  He rescued me when I was drowning, he will forever be my “Wave on Wave”, yet for me to give up, I would be the ultimate loser – Mike fought his ass off during his journey with that shit-face “leech” called Cancer – and in the end – Mike said Adios Asshole --- I have better things waiting for me --- he now is where we all yearn to be when it is our time…

Leaving 2013 and only praying that 2014 would offer light, hope and the chance of change…I was blessed…I met Bradley.  I never asked GOD to provide me with someone with an understanding of where I have been or where I am going…yet just to when the time arises, place someone in my life that doesn’t have to understand me, where I have been, where I am going, yet just love me and like me a little bit sometimes ;) ---- GOD provided.  He too is widowed…a commonality that I surely hate that we share, yet I can only hope that the Good Man Above knew not only handling this “Firecracker” of a gal, he too can handle my zero to sixty emotional breakdowns without a head turn or blink of an eye, just as I can his…

It is a day to day process…we are happy…no “Agenda”…only thing on our schedule is Happiness, laughs, a lot of Hugs and complete understanding even we do not understand but just know we “get it”

As always, I thank Ya’ll ---- since day one May 20, 1979 ---- GOD has been pretty Rad-ASS in putting people in my life at all the right times and keeping me a pretty great flow on a daily basis --- XOXOXOXOOX