“I Miss You When Something Really Good Happens, Because You're the One I Want to Share it With - I Miss You When Something is Troubling Me, Because You're the Only One Who Understands Me SO Well - I Miss You When I Laugh and Cry, Because I Know That You're the One Who Makes My Laughter Grow and My Tears Disappear - I Miss You All the Time, But I Miss You the Most When I Lie Awake at Night and Think of All the Wonderful Times We Spent with Each Other for Those Were Some of the Best Memorable Times of My Life - Author Unknown”
It was raining…I hate driving in the rain! It was an area out of my element, I love where I live and all around me…sometimes scared to venture out of my “loop” and try new things. It was a drive, something inside pushing me to go – continue to move forward, accept my “new norm”.
It was as I could hear the theme song to ‘Cheers’ playing through my head, you know “The place where EVERYONE knows your name.” Well in fact, this area, no one knew me nor was my name…I facing it head on. I logged that I had recently come in contact with a new group to Houston. A widow/Widowers group that caters to “Our” age --- the “youngsters” in this “club”. This was the first official meeting for us to introduce and get to know one another, (which only had me circling the area for an additional hour – ha! Dang GPS) to now step out from behind the screen and get to know one another and share our stories…I headed to the door.
Thanks to the day and age we are in of Face book and Internet sharing, I pulled the door open and was welcomed with smiling faces and warm hugs…it was as we had already known each other for a little while, even only by our circumstances that brought us to these four chairs in Tomball, TX. Immediately we dived into conversation that took us from discussing being in our new role, to hobbies and interests to by the end of the night being introduced to all sides of our personalities with some “Meep, Meeps”, a “Whoop!” and a “Boop with a side shake” by the end of the night – it was a TRUE unforgettable experience that has opened up a door for new found friendships that will last a lifetime…unbreakable bonds.
It’s a role that no-one unless you have walked the shoes as a window/widower, you can’t come close to knowing. Losing a loved one is one thing and I have lost a few close to me, and each loss whether a parent, sibling or a friend, the feelings of grief remain similar but not exactly the same. This group allowed us all to come together in a neutral, vulnerable environment to offer a since of compatibility that is like no other…I am thankful! I walked away at the end of the night with new insight on others that have traveled this path, seeking understanding from others that is not so easily found.
I found this group ‘The Young and the Widowed’ through an MDA publication. I hope that anyone who reads this will know there IS life after cancer. I felt alone, though I had so many family and friends for support, I yearned to find others who may really understand what the journey I have completed with my husband of 5 years and onto my new journey as a widow. The website is --- http://theyoungandthewidowedhouston.com/ and a small group to date, our goal is to continue to spread the word to all widows/widowers in the Houston area…you are not alone…you do not have to be.
It is a choice that we/some were not prepared for, surely a choice at our young ages that as a happily married couple spending our “Forever” with our partners…we now have our lives ahead of us – a horizon of opportunities that I know in my heart our loved ones would surely want us to move forward in peace and live our lives to the fullest just as they taught us to!