If I Die Young...

"We really have gotten to live and love at our young ages. ‘If I Die Young,' for us, is about if it all ends at this moment, look at what we've gotten to do. Whatever time we're given will be absolutely enough as long as we make the most of it - Kim Perry"

Ok so my mind has been completely ALL over the place for a bit – not in a bad way, just ideas coming and going of things I want to do, things I have done and the things that will possibly JUST happen due to this of mine called LIFE.  I feel my mind is spinning and kart-wheeling, so a fair warning, this entry may be super long and you come back to it…or it may be entirely too short because I have forgot what I wanted to say (< ---It has been known to happen).  I feel lately I have the memory of whatever species on this planet has the shortest – yes, thank you – that one!

The excerpt above is from an interview with The Band Perry regarding the meaning behind ‘If I Die Young’…it is one of those songs that I absolutely love, but it has gotten so much play, I catch myself skipping the track or changing the station when it comes on – but now that I know the true meaning, it is beautiful and I have listened to it several times.

What is it in our daily lives that keep us grounded? I don’t mean grounded as in not abiding by our morals or not coming to work in a bikini (well unless your job allows – I’m jealous!)  So what is it?  For me, for so long, though I am a bit nutty, quirky and maybe even THAT girl (you know the weird one ;) I’ll claim it, and believe me for all that know me, I was like this way before Mike ever passed…shoot way before I ever met him…but in all fairness since his passing, I feel sort of thrown back into this huge world – a world that to me is going to SHAT, but I will maintain a happy disposition and will continue to pray for our country, our planet and yes…even our president.

Ok, so back to my point…since his passing, I have tried a lot of new things, met a lot of new people and continue to reconnect with old friends.  Some things that I can seriously take a peak back and say “Really?” but I won’t blame it on the loss of Mike – it is life.  I cannot live in fear of offending someone with my words or actions.  I am honest and just because I do not divulge it ALL, does not mean I lie.  I have been forced to step out of my comfort zone, but learning to adapt and except.  I will make mistakes, I will offend, I will make apologies but not for being me.  I will continue to convince myself I have a GREAT English accent (though I throw it with a “Goo Dai Mate – really I have convinced MANY ;) I will continue to convince myself I am a great dart player and the board to blame for my never depleting score.  I will continue to welcome any beachgoer brave enough to hand our group her prosthetic leg and dive into the ocean and even chase her float down the beach while holding her 40oz beer.  I will NEVER give up my cheater chopsticks and give into the real ones.  I will continue to love unconditionally (even if you hurt me), well who am I kidding, then I’ll just poke you with a fork (oh girl yes I did ;) I will continue to make up my own vocabulary and sing the wrong words to every song, because they sound better (OK, well because I really don’t know them ;) I will continue to spell Cartwheel with a K.  I will continue to pass out my happiness daily just to make someone, ANYone smile and save the tears for behind my closed doors or in the shower (for that is the best place to cry – true story).  I will continue to take silly pictures of myself throwing up a deuce and gladly accept pics form my friends – even to prove a fashion no no! I WILL just continue to be me and again not apologize.

I suppose all this has been on my mind, for my motto is Fear Less, Regret Nothing.  Granted, I am not HAPPY with all things I have done in my 33 (and yes I will continue to age – I wasn’t fond of being 29 forever – bring on the face products and SPF 80 – and did you know they make a 100??? True story)!  I know that as “adults” we must of course change for certain situations – like work, church (unless you go to a tent revival – you can get crazy up in there!) but overall, though we must at times change our demeanor NEVER compromise you for anyone but YOU!  Live life with the blinders off and barefoot (Mentally not in the streets ;)  Love like there is no tomorrow.  Forgive and Forget is a lot easier than I thought – makes for a happy heart! As we strive to do bigger and better, know it is OK to take a breath, look around and it usually is already there. 

In closing, though I am young, I am certain for a few things that I will do daily…brush my teeth, use the restroom, shower, work and eat (that is if I am given another day)…for the rest is up to HIM, and I welcome it all.  I hope we all learn to embrace what we have, who we are – not one of is perfect, for as I said before, GOD didn’t make us perfect…just pretty!

XOXO LC