“Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future - Paul Boese”
How ultimately true is the statement above? I recently wrote in a blog a little while ago, or a posted statement that I am choosing no longer to rent out space in MY head for useless things such as grudges, feelings of insecurities brought on by others and above all else, the ability to not forgive.
I can tell you this weekend spent with our Family and Friends at the lake was a joyous experience. As do a lot of you know along with my family – we are far from perfect. And now completing my family with Mike since 2007, we too are not and never will be perfect. Since Mike’s diagnosis, I have stated that I am human and things still irritate me, I still get mad and I still get hurt. The difference though now is, I let it go a lot easier and do not allow the space that can be consumed with much more important thoughts be consumed with anger, or the ability not to forgive.
This weekend brought a lot of light to my relationship with my family and ALL we have been through. There has been a lot of hurt, a lot of disappointment and to this day still some resentment felt by some. As for me, I have forgiven all and am moving on to my main focus and that is my husband and him becoming Cancer-Free. The little things, and I mean the little things – you know them as well, just do not pop out and I no longer continue to dwell upon what happened, what was said or even done…we are all human and we are ALL not perfect…no matter how much we try to put ourselves upon the petastool of being the judger and judging all around us – to you I simply say – it’s time to step down.
In our life times we are going to cross boundaries. When those boundaries are crossed, if we are truly loved or have the ability to love, we can approach this with an open heart and let those that have crossed us know that we may be hurt or disappointed and even set new boundaries, but always know that we too are human and we ourselves have crossed those boundaries – we all have…just as we don’t like to be lied too, don’t lie to yourself.
The one thing about family and is different than all else including friendships (though we all have friends it seems we like/love more than our own family at times) is that your family will always be just that – your family. Your family has been there since day one and will always be there till the end. Though we do not all have the relationships that we strive to have as one would like with family, we are just that and will always be. In the times that Mike are going through now, we have been blessed to be given the gift of forgiveness by family and friends, for not only what we have done to them, but we have been fortunate to return this and forgive the ones that have “trespassed against us”…as the Lord’s prayer states, let’s not only repeat in times of need, let’s learn to live by this prayer whole heartedly.
Mike and I doing great and the Family and Friends that surround us now, are amazing and they continue to be! This does not mean the ones that are not here right now are loved any less or forgiveness is not in our hearts for them just as we hope that it is for us too.
If you notice the longer you stay mad at someone or do not speak – can you REALLY ever remember what got you to that point? (Of course this is not for any unforgivable situation – and I know to each his own, but I speak of abuse, physically hurting someone or just an act of such hatred, you have no choice but to not forgive).
A lot of the mistakes we make as humans is not necessarily done on purpose to seek out and hurt someone…for those who do this – then that is a shame…and you should be thankful for loving family and friends who have forgiven…and here is hoping that one day, just one day you will learn this lesson and know the importance of the need for these relationships and that again, we are all not perfect, nor do we claim to be…
In closing, this weekend was time of reflection for Mike and me. It was a time that we will cherish forever; being in such a diverse group of Family and Friends that GOD has blessed us with and has promised to be ours --- Thank You LORD!
XO Lyndie
No comments:
Post a Comment